Don't Forget - 3 Oct. 10

It would have been a lot cooler if I'd actually published this post on October 3rd. Oh well.

This is meant to be my new personal blog, hopefully with somewhat of a focus. To explain that—and the name of the blog—I'll have to tell a story.

My favorite anime series of all time (and one of my favorite stories of all time) is Fullmetal Alchemist (the original anime from 2003, not 2009's Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood). In that story, two young boys, the Elric brothers, heartbroken after the sudden death of their mother, attempt to use alchemy restore their mother to life. However, the laws of alchemy state that for anything to be gained, something of equal value must be lost—and unbeknownst to the brothers, nothing equals the cost of a human soul. The experiment fails horribly, and the brothers' own bodies are spontaneously used as recompense for their attempt. The older brother loses his his right arm and left leg—forcing him to use full metal prosthetic replacements—while the younger brother is left without a body at all; just a soul clinging to an empty suit of armor. The brothers realize that they've lost their mother completely, but they resolve to go out into the world and search for a new path in life: to discover the hidden truths of the world and find a way to restore their broken bodies. On the day the brothers leave home to start their journey, they burn their house behind them so that they won't have the option of giving up.

The song that plays over the scene is a Russian song, "Bratja" ("Brothers"). A few sections of it (translated to English) are particularly poignant:

              Beautiful mother, soft and sweet

              Once you were gone, we were not complete

              Back through the years, we reached for you

              Alas, 'twas not meant to be

              So where do we go from here 

              And how to forget and forgive?

              What's gone is forever lost

              Now all we can do is live

There's probably something to the idea of dealing with the loss of a parent that resonated with me about Fullmetal Alchemist. My dad died when I was fourteen, and I discovered FMA a couple of years later. The overall vibe of FMA isn't at all what you'd normally expect from a fantasy/sci-fi series; there's no epic heroic quest for the brothers to finally revive their mother. Instead, they're forced to live with the consequences of their actions and say, "what do we do from here?"

I'm not going to go into a ton of detail here (those of you who know me probably already know most of the details), but although I've been through some awful things in life, moving forward has always been difficult for me. It's not that I don't have wants or dreams, but there's a big difference between wanting a better life and being willing to actually leave and burn your old life behind you.

After the Elric brothers leave their home, the older brother scratches the date they burned their house into his pocket watch, along with the words "don't forget." So this blog is my own reminder: from here on out, always move forward.